1. Appreciate Family Members

Learning to appreciate family is a core trait to longevity in a relationship.

When Todd and I started appreciating what each other did around the house and for each other, that was the beginning of change. I had started focusing on the not so good traits that he had...and guess what... those are the things I saw every day.

One way to appreciate family members is to create a notebook if you have to, and write down what you appreciate about your mate, child, boss or other person that you are currently having issues with.

This allows your focus to move from the negative to the positive. Guess what..we humans love when someone pays attention to us. So if you only pay attention to the negative, you will have that person responding negatively to you, because they are at least getting your attention. So by paying attention to positive things, and ONLY complimenting positive aspects, the person will exhibit more positive aspects.

Happy families focus on each others strengths. Try to complement your family members several times a day. Try it...and watch what happens.

Happy families make silent note of and share positive thoughts with each other. Make a positive comment about how your son is paying attention to his sister in a supporting manner. Say something nice about something he or she did or said.

What are some of your families unique talent, achievements, special qualities, or characteristics that make the other person unique.

The most important part about growing the spirit of appreciation within your family is if you can you find ways to be positive even when another family member makes a mistake. Strive to develop closeness and show love at home despite set backs.

Speak Each Others Language

We appreciate family members when we learn to speak each other's "language" Sometimes we make comments that we think are loving towards another family member, but if we are not communicating on their frequency than he or she may not see it that way at all. Think about it this way:

One day Todd came home from work. He was exhausted and a touch testy. He was greeted enthusiastically by me, also exhausted and a bit testy. He pulled me into a close hug, and said, "Rebecca, I love you!" Then he started into the bedroom. But that is not what I wanted at the time...I guess it sounds ungrateful I I said, "Todd, I don't want you to love me, I want you to sit and talk with me!" Luckily Todd is a special person and he knew I was asking for something I needed.....it made the difference in my day.

Ideas to strengthen your family:

It is fun to celebrate "Caring Days." Find out what other family members want that is meaningful to them. Make plans to send those messages often through your actions.

Todd and I frequently take time out, especially in the summer, for "caring days" This is a day that we do what the other person wants to do...we love to go to the river together, so our days are mutually wonderful.

I like to have a jar full of slips of paper with caring thoughts on them. "give a hug to someone today" "clean up with out being asked to" You get the picture.

Put this into action on a daily basis and see your family love and appreciation deepen.

Love Notes

My personal favorite it leaving posit Love Notes. All you do is Write a short love note and stick it where the intended person will be sure to see it. I have notes that Todd gave me over 8 years ago, still stuck up on places for me to look at.

You can place regular notes under a pillow or in a backpack, briefcase, or purse. Write something like "I'm proud of you for working so hard on your

The Power of Touch

You carry a powerful amazing and healing thing within you. The Power of Touch. Touch can be a powerful way of showing affection, love, and appreciation. Small children as well as your adult loved ones often like to snuggle with their family members. It is a deep an abiding trust to allow such vulnerability. Do not breech that trust, at any cost. Really even just a hug, a kiss, a touch on the hand or the shoulder can say a lot to any person regardless of age.

Any of these ideas will get you started. I will be excited to hear about how you implement these into your Happy Family.

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